Podcast Nation : Roger Smalls

Roger Smalls - ID : 118

ipod touch Thu, 06 Sep 2007 06:16:54 -0500

today they tell me for £269 i can walk into starbucks and purchase music that only plays on the new ipod. for the sum of £0 i;ve been walking into HMV and buying music that plays on anything and i haven't had to spend £4.30 on coffee that looks and tastes like diarrhea.

blinder behind the eyes Tue, 17 Jul 2007 05:37:03 -0500

it feels like the morning after the night before. but i feel cheated though as i didnt do anything last night. will these headaches never end?

Little Britian in the US Thu, 12 Jul 2007 17:40:43 -0500

I dont understand why TV companys need to remake shows for american audiences.why are they making little britian in america? they will have to change the name to little america which wont make sense as america is big .unless you look at it in a spoon. we dont change american shows to english ones because we dont understand what they are saying.I understand what george bush says perfectly, I just dont understand why people let him.I have just got back from the pub and not much is making sence right now, I am trying to decifer the news without any luck.

Please vote for my poem! Mon, 09 Jul 2007 16:10:42 -0500

i have an email from simon toon from the slamidol podcast, he asks for you to vote for your favorite poem. here are the details from the email;;

The voting is open on Slam Idol contest 18. It's a video contest,
and the contestants are:

"No More Flan for Fatty" by Roger Smalls performed by Madge Weinstein
"Suicide Note: Bank Manager Lament" by Mat Lloyd
"Everyday" by Mike McGee
"Snow and Ice" by Don Schaeffer
"Hypocrites" by Paul Reyno
"I am whatever colour you see" by Dreadlock Alien

There is a round-up show which can be viewed here:

http://m-uk.podshow.com/media/3023/episodes/64823/slamidol-64823-06-09-2007.m4v

This show has 40-second excerpts of all 6 poems, to help you decide how many marks out of ten you'd like to award each poem.

Please remember it is important for you to vote fairly for all 6 poems. If you do not award proper votes for all 6 poems then your vote will be discarded.

Please spread the word! The AUDIO promo is available in MP3 format
here:

http://m-uk.podshow.com/media/3023/promos//slamidol-promo.mp3

The VIDEO promo is available on

PodShow http://www.btpodshow.com/video/persona_id=14287&movie_id=4d7d5af38455304eff97c8f92b9995e9),
YouTube ( http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_UeVk48gXT0 ) and
MySpace ( http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&videoID=2034227118 ).

Please email me if you'd like the original M4V file to mix into
your own video podcast.

Subscribe to the video feed, watch the videos in full, and vote now
at http://www.slamidolpodcast.com/

please vote at simons site. also congratulations to simon for the birth of his infant child.

google jobs Thu, 05 Jul 2007 04:59:57 -0500

i think google should do a service called google jobs which helps you search for jobs. there are so many different web sites for getting jobs in healthcare but most contain the same jobs. they can do it for products and images but why not jobs? i have around 130 readers on feedburner, surely one of those must work for google - if you do then please mkae this happen.

Wanted for TV segment "Diana and Me" Sun, 01 Jul 2007 13:56:37 -0500

Have you been hospitalised then been visited by Lady Diana? are you mental? Do you genuinely beleive that an ex-princess on a photo opportunity to upset the inlaws miraculasly cured you of a broken leg by regardless of being surrounded by a team of medical experts? can you look tearfullly into a camera and convince a stadium full of chinless aristocratic toffs who cant dance that being touched by a member of the royal family was just like Jesus curing lepars? BBC television are putting together some over sentimental short segments called "Diana and Me" and would like to hear from you if you'd like to take part in the tv event of the day featuring some of the biggest names in mime like lily alen, will young and that flange off the black eyed pees.

i dont think she would have wanted this.

average speed cameras Mon, 25 Jun 2007 15:31:10 -0500

there is some uproar in the community that we are having some average speed cameras installed near where i live. there is nothing average about them atall, the average speed camera is a bright yellow box on a 12 foot pole, yet these are twice that hieght and painted blue. i feel the goverment are just after catching people out to make more money. its a good job i dont drive otherwise i'd be really upset, but sometimes its easy to get cuaght up in public anger like when s-club split up.

boring big brother Thu, 31 May 2007 16:28:39 -0500

i think i am going to give it a miss this year unless the all women-house is forced to wear clingfilm.they said they are going to stop racism since the problems from the last series but last night they employed chris moyles,thats like a tv show being accused of being too homophobic and then employing chris moyles, or too sexist then employing chris moyles. instead i am going to spend my time on the comuter as i havenot looked much on the internet recent other than for the usual bodely functions.i have many weeks of podcasts to catch up on.

carbon footprint Thu, 31 May 2007 06:01:23 -0500

what is the big deal about carbon footprints? lots of carbon is good for making pencils and fizzy drinks.

Nostalgia Tue, 29 May 2007 05:15:27 -0500

I think nostalgia is looking on the bright side of things after its too late.

Rogers Tube 1 Mon, 07 May 2007 16:20:36 -0500

today i didnt have to go to work today nor had anything to do so i have stayed in and made a new video called Rogers Tube made up from video clips on the internet. RogersTube1.mp4

scifi buffs Thu, 03 May 2007 03:56:18 -0500

isnt is ironic how people whos interests include 'fear of the paranormal' actually have a deep seated fear of the normal. gavin upstairs cannot afford to buy his girlfriend a drink after work yet somehow manages to order the complete xfiles boxette on amazon.

homicidal maniac lookalike Wed, 25 Apr 2007 16:04:01 -0500

i have just turned on the film doctor strangelove and have noticed the following two people both look and act exactly the same.

Jack D Ripper

George W Bush

it worrys me that jack d ripper is a fictional charector and bush isnt yet they are both hellbent on killing inncodent people. what worrys me more is that the most powerful man in the world right now has trouble holding a telephone up the right way.

Video podcast - No More Flan For Fatty Thu, 19 Apr 2007 03:47:57 -0500

my second video now up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

last week i composed a poem for the slam idol poetry competition and desided to ask madge weinstein from www.yeastradio.com to perform this on her video cameras. you have to click this link then wait http://m.podshow.com/media/7648/episodes/57663/insanefilmsipod-57663-04-17-2007.mp4 where it will appear but is very slow if you are not at work or the library. it contains words and gestures.

when it apears on slam idol please please please please vote for me and madge!!!!!!!! i have included the transcript of the poem i sent in the email to be performed should anyone need it. thankyou to madge for recording.

prolude

I reguallly sit near a girl on my bus ride to work who is in her early thirties, has long red hair with matching face and has let herself go over the years. Often I wonder what it is like to be her and have decided to compose my thoughts into a poem for you. It is a poinient verse about a unnammed lady in crisis struggling with achiving outer buetey and inner peace and wrestling with a past love. Its called 'No More Flan for Fatty'.if you could do it to the tune of the argos commercial that would be nice, if not then dont woorry.

Number 38 bus
Size 38 booty
Go on, look at me and stare
Running down the street for my ride

I knew of love once
In my childhood days
Prepubencent memorys
Before Barry and his tuck shop

Panting and groaning
I waddle on board the bus
my layers of ankles
dripping with sweat and milk

Loves young dream, we passed notes in class
there wasn't a pubic convenience that could contain our passion
The eyes of love do not recognise bronchial disorders
We just be Sippin on gin n grease

As the driver demands the tarriff
I fumble in my leather purse
My large cumbersome fingers
Groping for money otherwise spent on food

I never used to be like this
My 18th birthday I caught him feeding
feeding with another, much larger than I
Making me more determed to be someone bigger, larger, better and chubbier

I clumsely waddle down the isle
My beady eyes scan the mass transit for a place to sit
Before the bus increases its velocity (winks slowly)
I need to park this blomondge of an ass pronto

Saw Barry just last week
Boy, that hairy grease bitch still looks good. (inserts middle+ring finger into mouth sideways to camera X 4)
Jelously as I observe he's with a new girl
This time shes a skinny

Diet from now on, wash away those bed sores
Cleaning up my act for barrys new tastes
say goodbye to them roaches in my crotch
There aint no more flan for fatty

hoe hoe hoe
green giant

exited about poetry Tue, 17 Apr 2007 15:19:41 -0500

i recently composed a poem to enter into the slam idol poetry podcast, instead of recording it i have asked madge weinstein to perform it as she has video aparatus. aparently the video will be ready to download tomrrow to everyone on insane films, i am already downloadingg the preview overnight and cant wait until tomorrow. however i will have 2 wait until tomrrow due to modems.

today has been non-eventful. the only sparkle in the water of my dull life has been observing the goings on of iain mcshane. i plan to cut my toenails later and also sleep.

give someone enough rope and they'll han ... Sun, 15 Apr 2007 17:31:02 -0500

that is silly. if i was due to be hung i would ask for lots of rope which would give me more chance of reaching the floor.

two of the most popular downloaded videos on the internet. saddam hussain and ask a ninja.

ADD Thu, 29 Mar 2007 08:45:25 -0500

Am I the only person left in podcasting who can concentrate?

copy videos Wed, 28 Mar 2007 04:48:21 -0500

how do i save youtube videos onto my computer? there is no "save picture as" option for videos that i can see. i phoned up the helpdesk today but they do not know. please email roger_smalls@hotmail.co.uk if you can help and stop emailing me about business opportunities.

Twitter is Blogger just without the cont ... Mon, 19 Mar 2007 17:16:41 -0500

The next logical step will be to abolish the title too. All that remains will be the time and date when you use your computer. in the future peoples blogs will just have a list of dates, like a library book.

12 March 2010
13 March 2010
16 March 2010

i think this may be boring and will continue to blog my fantasies, dreams and other such matters insted.

my prediction on the future of the music ... Tue, 20 Feb 2007 09:51:06 -0600

i am dismayed that uk pop music top 40 charts are now based on the number of downloads a file gets legally.this has grave implicatons.

the top 40 show will be compiled and presented by the type of people who work in my IT department with sweat, social and eating disorders rather than traditional DJS like dave lee travis and mark goodyear.

if something crap ends up at number one hackers will be able to gain access to confidencial information to 'name and shame' the poeple who put the crazy frog in our faces for weeks at a time. blackmale and public lychings would happen.

pornography would start apearing in the charts due to the high numbers of the downloads. i cant remember the last time i downloaded an mp3, yet i downloaded well over 50 mucky mpegs around 2 hours ago when the boss left his desk for lunch. surely this will dent the charts in some way? insted of cliff richard being this years christmas number one we will all be celebrating 'parishiltonnightvisionhandjob03.mpeg' being played at partys inbetween slade and mudd.

something must be done immeditaly. as an apathetic person who cant be bothered to think of any more examples i'm not about to do anything myself so it is up to you.

Who sent the other seven? Mon, 19 Feb 2007 10:01:03 -0600

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/6375543.stm

knockback Fri, 09 Feb 2007 16:56:35 -0600

my appearance "isnt suitable for camera"
i am "not channel 4 material"
noone would watch me in a million years
i would be "best to stay at home and watch the tv"

desciton time Fri, 09 Feb 2007 05:42:08 -0600

it has been a tough choise - the potental for free rent +food for 2 weeks or 5 pairs of boobs and a pig.i have made the bold step to go to london tomororw to attend the big brother auditions and declined the offer to go with the girls to the cinima. a group o us will be driving up on saturday. i do not know what to wear or what to say.the hole thing confuses me.

podcast - soundseeing tour of the curry ... Wed, 07 Feb 2007 04:25:36 -0600

had to work tonight but managed to pick up the curry cottege keys from skidwhiskers and recorded a quick sound seeing tour at adam currys old hose. its taken me ages to copy the file to my pc then upload the mp3 and i am really tired. time is running out for the tour so you must act fast. email me at roger_smalls@hotmail.co.uk with the number of people in your party and i will arrange your guided tour. it was very cold walking home from work and our heating does not work. i will sleep.

you may download it here......... DSC20070208_currycottegeSOUNDSEEING.mp3

dilmenai Tue, 06 Feb 2007 07:48:59 -0600

i have a puzzle and am not sure what to do. on saturday i was planning to go to london for the big brother 2007 auditions as it would mean free rent and alcohol for a bare minimum of 2 weeks if i got in. i would aslo get the opportunity to prove that england has some normal people in it too and put straight the fiasco which ocurred last week with india and whatnot. however a group of the girls at the office want to see charlottes web in the evening, a movie about a pig and i have expressed interest at watching it. iam at a loss as to which choise to make. help!!!!!!!!!

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